A copper pulled over a motorist on the freeway.

"Get out of the car please, Sir", said the cop, "and step to the rear of the vehicle"

The driver got out of the car and followed the cop around th the back of the car.

"Sir", said the copper, "Your rear tail light is out"

"Oh my God", screamed the driver, "Oh no, this is terrible. Oh Lord, I don't believe it. What am I going to do?". Then he threw himself onto the ground.

"Settle down, Sir", said the cop, "it's only a tail light!"

"Bugger the tail light", said the driver, "where's the bloody caravan?"

cheers

zambuk

A jockey was sitting on his horse in the mounting yard when the Trainer approached and popped something in the horse's mouth.

"What's that you're giving him?", asked the jockey.

"Just a peppermint", said the Trainer.

Just then, the Chief Steward walked over. "I just saw you slip something into that horse's mouth", he said. "What was it?"

"It's peppermint Sir", said the Trainer. "Here, try one" He handed the Chief Steward one. "I'll have one myself, just to show you there's nothing funny going on"

So the Trainer and Chief Steward popped the things in their mouths.

"Alright, but you can't be too careful", said the Chief Steward, as he walked off.

The Trainer turned to the jockey and said," Alright, now let the horse lead. Let him go in the straight. He'll be flying. In fact, if you have anything passing you, it'll either be me or the Chief Steward!".

cheers

zambuk

LOL thats some pretty good stuff ;D

A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic
water mister to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.

When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and you
experience the scent of fresh mown hay.

In the meat new supermarket there is the aroma of charcoal
grilled steaks with onions.

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and
cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs
frying.

The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread
& cookies.

I don't buy toilet paper there any more.

LOL! Now thats funny right there. I don't care who you are!